Monday, October 18, 2004


it isn't fair; i can't get organized. there's always too much to write about and never a way to get it all down. i feel compelled to make a record of everything i see and do and am touched by these days, but by the time i ever get to a place where i can write it, several hundred other things have come to pass and that past is far, far away, almost out of reach... today that same compulsion is coupled with an urge to shred certain fucker's brains into a bloody puss, and i don't even have the energy to elaborate on why... probably if i were to try to begin to explain it to you, you would think i'm being silly or illogical. things are making me hellishly angry and i'm not sure why. here i am shedding tears over a computer in borders, where you're not supposed to be shedding tears, or giving off emotions at all, when it comes down to it...


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